November 22, 2003

shell as his skin

We are all sitting around (all of us, every one, I suppose), it's a party at least a television event, there is popcorn and soda. Everyone is there, the atmosphere is cheerful and giddy.

There is an old man, hovering on the periphery... a jewish grandfather type, wearing a seesucker suit and mopping his face periodically with a handkerchief. He is a bluer shade of celebration, bitersweet. We talk for a while. He makes unrememberable jokes, which make me laugh gently.

[unremembered transition]

Outside, I'm walking to the door coming back in. I reach for the door, and see that it is ajar. Peeking from behind it is a gray, rubbery statue of the old man. Intrigued and slightly frightened, I reach for the staute to probe it with my hands, when the old man callls from behind it.

He is a cancerous wound of a face. There is nothing human about his features, except perhaps the almond shaped slits that I recognize from out earlier conversations. His skin is pink and smooth, bulbous in all the wrong places. He tells me about the circumstances of his disfigurement, and how the full body mask is a reasonable alternative to being shut away all the time, but he gets so hot.

I reassure him that it looks good. It looks good on him.

[unremembered transition]

We are walking around the city, (a foriegn city? Frankfurt?), taking Irving on his first walk through the city.

Posted by illovich at 1:14 PM | TrackBack

November 21, 2003

the littlest mermaid

A fat man, he has a fishtank. In the fishtank is a tiny mermaid, the size of his palm. He keeps reaching his palm into the fishtank, to reassure he and give her comfort.

She is terrified of me, and retreats to his palm when I get near the fishtank.

He coos to her, trying to reassure her that I'm nice and that she should say "hi."

Posted by illovich at 1:17 PM | TrackBack

November 13, 2003

me am not serial killer

I'm at the old squat, Hell Squat, with a still camera and a video camera, taking footage, documenting, mostly shitty walls. I go for this sort of thing.

I'm leaving and there's a black guy, really looking roughed up by life on the street; one eye squinting, jeans so faded they'd be white if they weren't so grey, ashen dirt all over him. He's trying to get my attention, he wants something. I'm trying to ignore him.

He sees my camera. I panic, thinking he's going to try to take my camera, which is a heavy box of unlikely gears and levers with an insanely complicated 6-lens telescoping assembly, looking like some sort of fractal cannon.

He doesn't want money or the camera, he wants help, help dragging the bags out of the basement.

I never went in the basement.

He's dragging some now, I hadn't noticed before. Thick, black contractor bags, with something sticking at odd angle out of the central mass, like 2x4s or branches.

"What's in the bags?" I ask.

He opens the bag to show me the bodies. Rotting, desiccated, legs are all I can really get a good look at, yellow skin, oozing sores.

I run.

[unremembered transition]

A policewoman is questioning me. She's beautiful and black, like a TV show cop on a show about models who quit modeling and become cops. She has hair braids, island style, like Bo Derek in 10.

I'm the prime suspect, but she's pretending that maybe I can give her some clues as to who really did it.

I'm trying to remember anything, any clue and then I remember... it was Bob! I start shouting at her, "Bob, bob... he lived in the front room, he had a computer and this is like 1984." I look over at Kat, who's on an incongruous bunk-bed off to the side... "was it 1984?"

"More like 1987, hun," she says. She is bored out of her mind.

"Okay it's more like 1987, but come on! Nobody had a computer then. And this guy had a computer, and he was a programmer, and he had money, but what was he doing at the squat? What was he doing there?"

The policewoman seems amused, but helpless.

"How am I going to find this guy?" she asks finally.

"I don't know, but I see him around. I've seen him on the trolley... he's around. He's in Philly! His name is Bob!"

[unremembered transition]

I wake, later and I remember: his name wasn't Bob.

In my head I hear a sound, more of a distant memory of a sound... a [whee! whee!] sound, like a bat screech mixed with a squealing tire, staccato, repeated once.

[whee! whee!]

"Vince," I mumble.

His name was Vince.

Posted by illovich at 1:40 PM | TrackBack